“Most of the time he’ll be working and so much of his freedom will have to be symbolic.  And what will be his or any man’s most easily accessible symbol of freedom? Why, a woman, of course.  In twenty minutes, he can inflate that symbol with all the freedom which he’ll be too busy working to enjoy the rest of the time. He’ll see.”- The Veteran to the young man headed to New York for what he believes is the restoration of his ambition and hope. Prose written in Ralph Ellison’s Invisible Man

I wanted to share this particular line because Ellison’s point about symbolic or representational freedom is so powerful.  I think one can substitute the Veteran’s answer to the question: “What will be the most easily accessible symbol of freedom?” with almost any response.  For me, it’s been food, eating out, shoe shopping, romantic relationships, sex…I won’t dull you with my list! I wonder if you too can identify with this idea of how certain things or habits become symbolic markers of the freedom we hope and wish for as we sit imprisoned by our own personal frustration and psychological distress.  We reach for that someone or something that makes us feel in CONTROL or gives us the relief from the pressures and vicissitudes of life.  And it’s hard to let “it”, “him” go because that also feels like it means we are relinquishing the last bit of choice, ownership or freedom that we “have” even though holding onto it means a certain dying.

It is Sunday so it is befitting according to my spiritual tradition to honor the SACRED by inserting a relevant allusion to scripture.  This reflection calls to mind the scripture in Psalms in which the psalmist writes in Psalm 115:8

Those who make them (idols) will be like them, and so will all who trust in them.

What we ultimately think we have control, power over…what we think is the symbol and representation of freedom, choice, power can essentially be as limited as our very humanity and as fragile as our imagination as fallible as our shortsightedness.  The construction of god or God similarly follows.  Your perception does not necessarily make your belief TRUE or the accurate representation of The INFINITE. Your very freedom (or symbol) can actually be your enslaver. #endingDARK I don’t offer you a resolution here. LOL